The victimized spouse experiences excruciating pain of post traumatic stress upon the discovery of spouse infidelity. Post traumatic stress occurs acutely in this case transforming all the past memories related with the spouse into unbearable stress or wounds. 

Post traumatic stress is recognized and sensed only by the victimized spouse. No one else can sense the pain. No one else can understand how painful it is no matter what you do to blame yourself or others. Also, you are the only one who can treat your own post traumatic stress. No one else can help you get out of pain and restore your healthy psychology. 

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As you attempt to solve practical problems related with post traumatic stress and spouse infidelity, you actually aggravate the condition of post traumatic stress and keep destroying your life and the life of your loved ones. If you become dependent upon your spouse, who is in relationship addiction, which is another type of serious psychological disorder, or anyone else in any way, your condition will only deteriorate further. Your spouse or other people have no ability what so ever to treat your post traumatic stress. It is also not recommended that you become dependent upon any other information, knowledge, substance, or activities just to feel better. 

Korea Institute of Psycho-education guides people in post traumatic stress due to spouse infidelity to learn how to treat their condition and properly implement therapeutic tasks for adequate treatment. Some people stop the treatment process as they become comfortable, but they can and must resume the treatment process when they can. You must go all the way for treating post traumatic stress and building happiness ability continuing self-check for progress. Please, keep in mind that post traumatic stress can be treated only by yourself with your own will power and efforts.