These days, it is like autumn one day and like winter the next day. 

I also go back and forth in my treatment process. 

I go between cold and hot and between heaven and hell. 

I thought my spouse would never do that, but the moment came as it can come to anyone. 

I couldn't just do nothing, so I began to take counseling. 

My spouse just left the room during the third session. 

I tried to devote myself to my spouse thinking that I had been too absorbed into child rearing. 

It looked like things got better for some time, but I felt empty, raged, and wanted to die out of pain. What more could I do? I felt miserable and wanted to know how much I had to go more. My parents gave me such precious life to me and raised me with love and devotion. They had to work hard to send me to college. They would have never imagined that I would suffer from this kind of life. I went to visit my father's tomb, and I cried a lot. I made the decision that I would get a divorce. 

Then, I accidentally came across Mr. Kim's videos and writings. It made a lot of sense to me and decided to take the program. I worked really hard at first, but I had more days I didn't do well than I did well. It also took a lot of time to view training videos and do therapeutic tasks. I had doubts and questions on the program.

In 2 to 3 months, rage began to subside and I could breathe better. I had more comfortable days than hard days. I am 6 months into the program now, and the hardest part is not to pay attention to my spouse. However, now I know that we have lived well and we had trust. I understand that I suffered so much because I had a good life. I also have trust and hope that I will become even better as I keep doing therapeutic tasks. 

I am still in the process of treating myself. It is clear that this is my last chance in this life. I should be able to make my life a happy life. I can feel that I can do it when I focus on training and tasks. I think the day will come when I thank my spouse for giving me an opportunity to take a good turning in my life. I plan to keep going until the day even if the road is a little rough and tough.